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A nutty gift

The temperatures in my neck of the woods have been beastly these past couple weeks.  We’ve had several days of 100 degree temps, and that’s without the humidex added in!  The AC has been blasting non-stop, there isn’t a lawn in the neighbourhood that’s survived, and all nature seems overwhelmed by the onslaught of this equatorial heat.

So The Mister has been filling up the bird baths several times a day, but the birds are not the only creatures to receive his tender ministrations.  The squirrels, with whom I have a love-hate relationship, as they enjoy chewing through the telephone lines leaving me without phone or internet for days at a time, also rate his consideration.

“Just look at the poor things trying to make it through the day wrapped up in their l’il fur coats ‘n all,” he says.

“Mm,” I says.

“Now Missus, they’re God’s creatures too, you know.”

“All I said was ‘Mm.'”

“It was how you said it.”

“Mm,” I repeat.

Anyhoo, The Mister has taken to leaving a dish of water for the critters.  When he comes out to change it, he’ll throw what’s left under the bench in the back yard, and fill it up with fresh water.  After a day or two, we noticed that the squirrels were fighting each other over who got to stretch out under the bench just after the ground had been doused with water.  And by stretch out, I mean stretch out – flat on all fours, eyes closed in bliss, tail barely twitching.  We gather our unintentional mud puddle gives them welcome relief from the heat and parasites.  Well, if they’re happy, we’re happy.

I guess.

Then a few days ago, The Mister was retrieving our bikes out of the shed for our morning bike ride when I heard him utter those immortal words, “What the…?”

“What the what?” I asked.

“Look in your bike helmet.”

I keep my helmet in the basket of my bike, (The Mister doesn’t feel he needs a helmet) and I thought if some varmint has befouled my protective head gear, there’s gonna be trouble!  But what should I discover rolling around inside it, but a black walnut, big as you please!

It looked for all the world as if the squirrels were saying, “Missus, this is for The Mister.  Would you give it to him and tell him ‘thanks’.”

Welllll, all right.  But stay away from the phone lines, ‘kay?

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