I’ve started writing what will be the last poem of The Magdalene Poems collection. Not that this is in fact the last poem, but it is the poem that will appear at the end of the book. Why it came to me now, when there are still a goodly number of other poems to write, I can’t say. But it’s here and I’m working on it.
And it’s a bit of a bear. It’s been a couple of weeks of working on it, and I’ve only just started to organize my thoughts. And I don’t particularly like the thoughts I’m organizing. They’re scattered and decidedly unpoetical. I wonder if I have the vocabulary to write it at all. And I don’t know why this is so difficult. All I do know is this will take time, more than any other poem I’ve ever written, and commitment. I have to “show up” to write more consistently, especially for this bug-a-boo. So many other things can prevent me from getting to my writing desk, but truth be told, I let them. And here’s another confession – I’m a tad afraid to write this one. It’s so large, and so important, and what if I’m just not up to it? What happens to The Magdalene Poems then?
Feels strange to be writing the last poem. It means someday I’ll be done, the book will be complete, I will have said all I have to say about her. It’s been my project for years. How will it feel to be finished for good?
I know, I know – best not to look too far ahead and get all negative and stuff. So OK. One day at a time. One poem at a time. And one opportunity to take a leap of faith…at a time.
